My son is not raised in isolation. I believe he should know that I am growing right alongside of him. I’ve given myself permission to live, to be as I am, whether struggling or rejoicing. I will live what is true. I will not tuck myself away, I will allow for exposure and honesty. I will honor him and honor myself, which can only be done through openness, through relationship.

I do not pour myself out recklessly, drowning him, as it were, making him my life raft; rather, I live myself, my struggle, my truth next to his. I believe he will gain more security with a mom that isn’t pretending. If I were to build him a house of cards, complete with fake parents, and unrealistic expectations concerning relationship, family, and God; ultimately, I would set my son up for unrealistic expectations for himself. I don’t want him to pretend and hide from himself, the Divine, or me.

I trust in the Larger, the long view, the lifetime he has to live. I trust that he will understand, at some point, why I lived alongside of him. He might have more abrupt and honest experiences inside our home as a child, but I trust there will be less confusion, pretending, resentment, and hiding throughout his lifetime. I want to show him and allow him to experience: seamlessness, grace, and his own strength, abilities, creative energy, and failures. I want him to learn that life is lived through the years, the accumulated moments, the sacred ground cultivated through our daily living.

Sarah Bessey has written an inspired parenting series at Emerging Mummy that I’ve found invaluable. She is asking parents to join a Parenting Carnival and share “what we try to do to enjoy parenting right now“. I love the challenge to strip back my parenting and find a cord holding it {and me} all together. Be sure to click on the link and check out other parenting treasures.

Thank you Sarah for inviting us to all join the conversation.

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